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TorreyIsLDS

I'm So Heavy

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WHY IS EVERYONE 5'8"?!?

 

Im 5'8(.5)" as well.... hmmm, somethings up....

 

 

Anyway, I weigh like 125 pounds, and I think Im fine.

 

sk8bloke87, while I may not know what a 'stone' is, and while I may not be a doctor, I think that you should stop worrying. Your fine! Course, I think everyone should play some sports or something, but you are certainly not fat...

 

BTW, No Mercy, I love that smilie.... Posted Image

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SK8 - here is a site that might help you realise hat all these folks are saying about you NOT being overweight http://www.halls.md/ideal-weight/body.htm just enter the basic details and hit the calculate button.

 

Bruce, a stone is an old imperial weight. It is equal to 14 pounds. So id you weigh in at 145 pounds, divide it by 14 and you have your weight in stones and the rest is in pounds: 10 stone 3and a half pounds :lol:

 

Wish that was all I weighed but - at 6 ft 2 inches - I'll just dream on.

 

B)

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Well, I do think I'm fat. I looked in the mirror at school for once the other day, and I was appalled. I hate looking in mirrors.

work out, dont diet and dont be an idiot. Eat healthy, work out and you will be and feel healthy.

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Actually, I've been anorexic and bulimic for a long time.

 

I'm heavier now than I've ever been, even after losing 12lbs, because I gained about 10 in a week when I couldn't stop binging.

 

It just goes on in a cycle. I'm anorexic for a lonnnng time, then I have uncontrollable eating bouts, and then I feel so bad.

 

I've attempted suicide many times.

 

Many things are going on in my life right now. I just don't know about life anymore, or how long I will live to "enjoy" it. This is just one of my many struggles. Anyway, the point of this post is:

 

You can tell there is something really wrong with me. I just can't seem to get out of this depression. I skip my medication, which is probably dumb, but I don't like having to depend on pills to control my emotions.

 

I just wish life was easier. Anyway, if I ever stop being around here, you'll know I'm probably dead.

Edited by sk8bloke87

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Torrey ~

 

is this first time you've ever spoke of it? it takes a great deal of courage to admit when you're sick n' if this is a step in that direction then my hat goes off to you. knowing what's wrong is a huge step n' after that....well, it's downhill from there. the worst part is over.

 

but now you need to get some help, professional help n' the support of those near n' dear to you. you know you've got the support of folks here n' we'll listen whenever you need to talk. though, our hands are tied beyond that....

 

please, take that next step n' if you already have....just keep moving ahead, even if it's baby steps, keep moving....

 

here for ya :)

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Torry ~

 

just read your edited post....i know what it feels like to be in that dark place in your head n' how much it hurts. is there someone home with you right now?

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Torrey, you know if you need anything we are always here for you. May sound cheezy but seriously if you need a shoulder to lean on we are here for you to help you out buddy. You are an intelligent young man that has alot to live for, although things seem tough now they will straighten out for you.

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ive been there Torrey with depression not liking life and so on, for some people meds help a great deal and shouldnt be looked down upon,other people use diffrent forms like me.....seriously pills dont work for me so in the end i put my finger to those who cause the problem and pretty much X then out of my life and so far i feel alot better not letting things keep me down but dont get me wrong im not cured i still get upset and depressed sometimes so ill just roll a fat one and smoke it with my GF :lol:

 

I guess its easier when you have atleast 1 person who cares thats always there and there is someone you can talk to that will not look down on you for feeling this way it does happen and it is ok.

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Actually, I've been anorexic and bulimic for a long time.

 

I'm heavier now than I've ever been, even after losing 12lbs, because I gained about 10 in a week when I couldn't stop binging.

 

It just goes on in a cycle. I'm anorexic for a lonnnng time, then I have uncontrollable eating bouts, and then I feel so bad.

 

I've attempted suicide many times.

 

Many things are going on in my life right now. I just don't know about life anymore, or how long I will live to "enjoy" it. This is just one of my many struggles. Anyway, the point of this post is:

 

You can tell there is something really wrong with me. I just can't seem to get out of this depression. I skip my medication, which is probably dumb, but I don't like having to depend on pills to control my emotions.

 

I just wish life was easier. Anyway, if I ever stop being around here, you'll know I'm probably dead.

Hang in there buddy. We're all here for you!

 

 

Yeah, I know I sound corny, but I mean it. :P

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Many things are going on in my life right now. I just don't know about life anymore, or how long I will live to "enjoy" it.

 

Having lost my sister to depression/suicide still hurts me everyday. :mrsgreen:

She was my best friend.

 

Meds are only the tip of the iceberg in treating depression....

 

You have to find someone (pro or amateur) to talk to and get "it" out of your system, the "it" being what really is bothering you deep down. You mentioning it in a forum is quite a large step…congrats. There is no shame in finding help… look for a group to go to if you feel up to it

 

Don't convince yourself that you want to check out... if you really think about it you just want to feel better and in time you can and will feel better....don't give up the fight.

 

I hope tomorrow is a better day for you B)

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Torrey ~

 

is this first time you've ever spoke of it?  it takes a great deal of courage to admit when you're sick n' if this is a step in that direction then my hat goes off to you.  knowing what's wrong is a huge step n' after that....well, it's downhill from there.  the worst part is over.

 

but now you need to get some help, professional help n' the support of those near n' dear to you.  you know you've got the support of folks here n' we'll listen whenever you need to talk.  though, our hands are tied beyond that....

 

please, take that next step n' if you already have....just keep moving ahead, even if it's baby steps, keep moving....

 

here for ya  :)

Yea, publicly. I felt very desperate when I posted that, and the Pit is like my extended family, even though I know most of you guys don't like me.

 

I'm very shy and introverted and keep things to myself, which is the root of most of my problems. I blame myself for lots of things. I feel no control over my life, and eating is the only thing I have control over.

 

I've been to counselling at a local psychiatric center, and been institutionalized, and I started psychotherapy a few months ago, but hated it. Under immense pressure from my girlfriend and her parents, I have restarted it. I went today for the first time in months, actually.

 

I was so convinced I was going to kill myself during the last hour. But I'm not so sure now. It's such a struggle for me, trying to balance my feelings.

 

Thanks firecracker, and Lindalou, and everyone else's concern. Lindalou mentioned in her PM that she wants more photos and poems. Photography is something that helps me immensely when I'm depressed. I took a few this week when I was really contemplating suicide. They made me happy. SOme of them are depressing though. Haha.

 

Well, here are a few of my favorites, compressed from their original 5.1mp resolution for faster loading:

 

 

http://zoneforums.com/torrey/Pics/curb.jpg

 

http://zoneforums.com/torrey/Pics/flag1.jpg

 

http://zoneforums.com/torrey/Pics/flag2.jpg

 

http://zoneforums.com/torrey/Pics/leaf.jpg

 

http://zoneforums.com/torrey/Pics/steepleflag.jpg

 

http://zoneforums.com/torrey/Pics/tree.jpg

 

http://zoneforums.com/torrey/Pics/weird.jpg

Edited by sk8bloke87

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Torrey ~

 

you've got a marvelous eye. that's a gift, ya know....

 

i'm grateful that something pulled you into the pit instead of further into the dark. you are safe here and now know that for a certainty. since you've been in counseling, you've been told, no doubt, that you don't have control over anything except yourself. it's true....

 

tonight you had control of yourself n' that's a good thing. a very good thing. you risked a lot by posting n' being able to trust folks is a hurdle that often takes a long time to get over. it was no baby step to type out what you were feeling....

 

what you're feeling as pressure from your girlfriend n' her parents is actually their feelings of love for you. yea, that's another hurdle. feeling that you're worthy of someone's love. but at some point, you simply have to accept the fact that you are loved n' for good reason....

 

even if you only realize that love at first in your head, your heart will follow in time. be patient with yourself. you'll find that the days when the world truly looks brighter through your eyes will begin to outnumber those that are dark.

 

just keep moving ahead :)

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Dude, I've been saving this picture for special occasions, here it is.

Posted Image

 

It takes a lot of balls to say what did, and I respect that. After my cousin died (he got mixed up with the wrong crowd and killed himself) my dad told me something that stuck with me ever since. Nothing is bad enough that you have to kill yourself, he told me, even if we have to buy you a plane ticket to anywhere and start a new life it is still better than not living. I suppose, it'd be more like restarting than shutting down.

 

I know several others beat me to it, but we are here for you man. Even if you just wanna talk you can PM me or e-mail and I'll gladly talk to you. Take care!

Edited by Salo35

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Torrey, as always your pictures are great.

 

I've been thinking of trying black and white and shied away from it. Guess what? Going to get some film and try it now! You have such an eye to see things that others may disregard.

 

Keep up the counseling, and talking. It really does help. :)

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